Frenemies; Identifying and Ending Toxic Friendships

We've all heard about, or maybe even experienced a toxic relationship. But toxicity with your romantic partner isn't the only kind that can exist. Toxic friendships are just as possible and, sometimes, even more damaging. Dealing with a toxic friend can be draining, and it's important to identify them as soon as possible to protect yourself. Speaking to a Psychic can help you discover who the right people are in your life and who you need to let go of.

How Do You Spot a Toxic Friend?

The easiest way to tell if a friend is toxic is to ask yourself how you feel after interacting with them. Toxic friends have an uncanny ability to make you feel like you're right back in high school, doubting yourself and your worth. Here are some signs you might be dealing with a toxic friendship:

• You're always worried about doing or saying the wrong thing when you're with them.
• They make you feel like you're not good enough.
• They always make everything about them.
• They talk about other people behind their backs.
• They don't make time for you.
• They don't seem to care about your happiness.

Types of Toxic Friends

Toxicity appears in many forms. Here are a few types of toxic friends to look out for:

The Low-Key Insulting Friend

The low-key insulting friend is the friend who always has a way of making you feel bad about yourself. They might even frame their insults as "compliments." For example, they might say something like, "Wow, you're so brave to wear that two-piece with your curves!" They're probably not that great of a friend if they're constantly putting you down when you're around them.

The Bad Influence

This is the friend who has a habit of getting you in trouble. When you were a kid, this could have looked like breaking the rules. Now, it might just mean you're uncomfortable with how they behave when you're out together. Maybe they would try to get you to flirt with someone when they know you're in a relationship or think it's funny to steal from a store or shop.

The Better Dealer

This friend always ditches you as soon as something better comes along. Maybe they never commit to plans, or if they do, they'll bail as soon as something more "fun" comes up. Flaky friends can often make you feel like a backup plan

The Two-Face Friend

How do you know if your friend is talking about you behind your back? Pay attention to see how they talk about other people. Do they always have gossip or something negative to say about mutual friends or people they know? If so, chances are they're giving everyone the same treatment — including you.

The One That Never Reciprocates

This is the friend who never puts any effort into the relationship. You're always the one to make the plan and always the one to sacrifice something for their happiness. When you talk, you only ever talk about their drama and problems, and they never seem to have time to listen to yours.

Think of it this way: If you stopped making an effort today, would you hear from your friend again? If you needed their help, would they be there for you?

The Mooch

The mooch is the friend who constantly asks for favors or help. They might need to borrow money or need a ride, or need you to drop everything to help them with their life. What's worse? The favors are always a one-way street.

How To Protect Yourself From a Toxic Friend

Establishing boundaries is the key to all healthy relationships, even with your frenemies. If you're an empath or a people pleaser, this can feel like the hardest thing in the world because you never want to let someone down or make them feel bad. Here are some tips that can help you protect yourself:

Put Yourself First

The first step to successfully distancing yourself from a frenemy is to realize your worth doesn't come from what they give you. It's OK to say goodbye to a relationship that's no longer serving you. Sometimes, it's challenging to distance yourself from a bad friend. Maybe they've been your friend for a long time, or they're someone you see a lot whether or not you want to. Break the toxic cycle by refusing to play their game. Establish boundaries that put you first. As soon as they realize you don't need their approval, they lose their power.

Focus on Positive Friendships

Give your energy to the people who deserve it rather than spending time and energy on a bad friendship. Focus on the people in your life who support you and make you feel happy. By giving more time and energy to these people, you'll prove to the toxic friend that you don't need them. The added benefit is you can develop relationships with those who are good for you and impact your life positively.

Tell Them How You Feel

If you still want the friend in your life, try expressing how you feel. Sometimes, toxic friends don't mean to be toxic. They might even express surprise or dismay at learning they're a pain point. Use "I" statements when expressing your feelings, and be very direct. You can say something like, "It makes me feel like you don't care about our friendship when you cancel our plans to spend time with someone else." Best-case scenario, they change their behavior.

More often, they might dismiss your feelings or change for a little before reverting back to the toxic behavior. At least then, you have confirmation that they're truly toxic and aren't interested in putting in the effort to save your relationship.

Knowing the best path forward is hard when you're at a crossroads or making an important life decision. Gaining direction and guidance is easier when you have the help of someone you can trust. By keeping an experienced Psychic in your corner, you can have the confidence you need to attract the right people into your life and ditch the wrong ones.